Skinner Sphere

A "What if?" look at the Bobs from Office Space interviewing the UN and some of its players. An added bonus, the guy is a Gimp user. Just a taste.

JOHN BOLTON
The thing is, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy. It's just that I just don't care.

BOB PORTER
Don't, don't care?

JOHN BOLTON
It's a problem of motivation, all right? Now, if I work my ass off and the UN writes a few extra resolutions, I don't see any effect on the world. So where's the motivation? And here's another thing, Bob. The French are on the Security Council. They have veto power!

BOB SLYDELL
I beg your pardon?

JOHN BOLTON
The French

BOB SLYDELL
The French?

JOHN BOLTON
The French, bob. So that means when I try to get something done, I have the French just vetoing it simply because the US wants it done. That's my real motivation - to avoid dealing with the French. That and the Chinese, and the Russians haven't really changed all that much, Bob. The UN treats dictators and thugs the same as democracies, they put Sudan on the human rights comittee, that's just not going to get anything useful done.

BOB SLYDELL
Bear with me for a minute.

JOHN BOLTON
Ok.

BOB SLYDELL
Believe me, this is hypothetical. But what if the UN was restructured to recognize the difference between dictatorships and democracies, between an Idi Amin and a John Howard? Would that make it any more effective?

JOHN BOLTON
I don't know. I guess. Listen, I'm gonna go. It's been really nice talking to be of you guys.

Labels: humor, politics